Househusband Dreams
by SamBuddy
Summary: "Honestly, if I could just stay at home and do nothing besides reading light novels, watching TV, or playing with Vita-chan, my life would be perfect. Unfortunately though, society tends to view people like those with extreme contempt; and rightfully so. People like those are seriously useless! They have no dreams, no aspirations, and no future. Luckily, I'm not like those people."


Honestly, if I could just stay at home and do nothing besides reading light novels, watching TV, or playing with Vita-chan, my life would be perfect. Unfortunately though, society tends to view people like those with extreme contempt; and rightfully so. People like those are seriously useless! They have no dreams, no aspirations, and no future. Luckily, I'm _not_ like those people.

At least _I_ aspire to be a househusband.

Not everyone agrees with me, though. No, actually, no one agrees with me. I don't even get what's wrong with being a househusband. Housewives exist. There are girls who aspire to be housewives too. What's wrong with boys aspiring to be househusbands? Seriously...

I close my eyes and let out as a sigh as I continue with the light novel I'm reading.

"Hikki, you know I heard that every time you sigh, a little bit of happiness escapes." I look up from my book and Yuigahama's looking at me with a bit of worry.

"Yuigahama-san, I don't think that's a problem for him seeing as he doesn't have any left. Isn't that right, Hikiyūutsu-kun?" [1]

I close the book I was holding and fold my arms. "Very funny. I'm not depressed though. I'll have you know that if I have at least a little bit of happiness left, I'll always find it in my dear Komachi."

"Gross! Siscon!" Yuigahama moves her chair away from me. That hurts you know. Seriously, I could die from that.

"Oi. There's nothing wrong with loving your little sister. It's completely normal for an older sibling to love their younger siblings."

I glance over to Yukinoshita to find her looking away. Some moments later though, she looks back at me. She doesn't say anything, but her eyes tell me something else. Everyone stays silent for a bit. Talk about an awkward atmosphere.

"I-I wouldn't know that!" Yuigahama says, sensing the mood going bad. Yuigahama, if you're good at anything, at least it's being good at reading the mood.

"And besides," she continues, "the love you're talking about and the love you have with Komachi-chan is _completely_ different, you siscon!"

"Yeah, yeah. I am Hikigaya Hachiman, the siscon." I sigh and reopen the book and continue reading where I left off.

We stay quiet for a while, and though the atmosphere isn't as tense as it was, the tenseness didn't disappear. Yukinoshita hadn't even said anything since either. Did what I say really affect her that much?

The silence is broken by a couple of knocks on the door.

"Please come in," Yukinoshita says. The door slides open and we see Zaimokuza enter. Oh boy. What garbage literature has he brought us this time?

"It is I, the Blademaster General, Zaimokuza Yoshiteru!" He shouts as he stomps through. "And I am in need of your service!" He stops in front of the table and places a hand on his chin with a wide grin on his face.

"What do you want, Zaimokuza? Another review of your latest 'masterpiece'?" I ask him with a scowl. I wouldn't really mind reading his work actually, if it wasn't literally garbage.

"Actually, Hachiman," he pauses and strikes a pose like he's doing a karate punch, "I'm here to ask you to help me…" he switches hands and now the other hand is open and raised in the air. Seriously what are you doing? "...CLEAN MY ROOM!"

No one says anything for a moment, until Yukinoshita clears her throat, glares at Zaimokuza and says, "Zaimokuza-kun."

He yelps, "Y-yes?" Ooh, Did the Ice Queen just drop the room temperature by a few degrees?

"You are a second-year high school student, are you not? You should be able to clean up by yourself without the help of others. Though we are the Service Club, we are not slaves that can be asked to do whatever you want. We're not a cleaning service to be employed."

Zaimokuza lets out a squeak as he hears that, then turns to me and says, "B-but, actually, I just need you to help me reorganize my things… I'm not asking you to take the trash out or anything like that." He laughs nervously as he finishes his sentence.

Yukinoshita glares at him for a bit before she placed a hand on her chin, and looks at the table for a while. She turned to Zaimokuza and said, "We'll help you organize, and teach you how to properly categorize your things, but you'll have to move your things around yourself."

Zaimokuza stares a bit at Yukinoshita. "O-okay!" He looks briefly at Yuigahama before turning to me and asking, "T-then, is Friday after class okay? I'll even let you stay for, uhh… dinner afterwards."

"If it's not too much trouble…?" I turn to both the girls.

They nod in agreement while Yuigahama says, "We can meet and head to Chuuni's place right after class."

"Okay! T-thank you! Then, see you on Friday! I will repay my debt with my blade some day." He declares with a grin, his pose looking like he's getting ready to draw an imaginary sword.

"Err, dinner is fine." I say, before he smiles and leaves.

Yuigahama sighs in relief a minute after the door closed. "Uwah! I we really were going to clean Chuuni's room. Good thing all we have to do is reorganize."

I look to Yuigahama and ask, "Why? What's wrong with cleaning? It _is_ one of the essential things you need to know to be a househusband"

"Still going on about becoming a househusband?" Yukinoshita tells me with a sad smile.

"Of course! I still think it's a valid dream."

"Hikki… Husband..." Yuigahama mutters. Ah, seriously, why do you doubt me?

"I-I am 100% confident I can do everything a househusband can do."

"Oh, really? That doesn't sound very confident." Yukinoshita raises an eyebrow at that, a challenging smile on her face.

"Of course. I can prove it too." I stop and think, "I'll clean Zaimokuza's room on Friday, like what househusbands would do."

"Househusbands would also organize things on their own," Yukinoshita says quickly.

Urgh! Well, she got me there. I form a frown on my face before I face the table and think of what to do.

"Then..." I begin, "how about I'm the one who cooks and cleans for dinner on Friday?"

"That doesn't really prove anything though. And you'd be intruding on Zaimokuza-kun's kitchen." Yukinoshita brushes a part of her hair behind her shoulders. She's not really giving me any chances to prove myself, huh?

"Well, whatever. I don't need to prove anything anyway. My arguments are sound and the dream of becoming a househusband is still valid." I finally declare with a bit of irritation in my voice. I look at both of them before finally returning to my book. Yukinoshita goes back to reading as well, and then Yuigahama starts tapping away at her phone. This silence goes on until club finished and left for home.

* * *

Friday. We had agreed to meet with Zaimokuza at the school gates before following him back to his apartment. I sent Komachi a mail about what I'd be doing today before we headed out. His place wasn't actually that far from school, only taking twenty minutes to walk. When we arrived at his apartment, we took our shoes off near the front door, and headed straight to Zaimokuza's room.

"Excuse us," we muttered as we entered his room. I was expecting it to be actually a lot dirtier and more of a pig sty, if I'm being completely honest. Actually, it's really clean. Rows and rows of floating shelves lined the sides of his room, almost full with light novels and manga. It appears organized even, seeing as the styles of the books seemed to be grouped together. Two short swords also adorned one side of his room. Oi, those aren't real, right? And how much did you even pay for those anyway? Though I do admit, they looked kinda cool.

Another side of his room was his desk that had his PC monitor and three big stacks of novels and manga. How could you even work here if these books were in the way?

"So!" Zaimokuza began, approaching his desk, "This is actually what I needed help with. I saw these books being sold for a _crazy_ low price somewhere and just had to buy them." He placed his hand on one of the shorter stacks and turned to us. Three whole stacks? Crazy indeed. "It's a lot of different novels, and I just need help placing them into the proper sections. Since there are so many, I thought it would be faster if I just asked for help." He nervously laughs as he looked quickly to Yukinoshita and Yuigahama.

"I admit that your… book collection appears to be quite organized," Yukinoshita says as her eyes drift from one end of the shelf to the other. "Well, I suppose we'll help you with placing the books in the proper places."

"I just hope there's nothing dirty in those stacks of books." Yuigahama says as she looks at one of the stacks.

Zaimokuza laughs quite loudly and nervously, before quickly grabbing the shortest pile and shoving them to me. Oi, that could've been dangerous! "Hachiman, help me with these!"

With the books in my hand, I place them on his bed, and look through them a bit. Ah, no wonder you gave these to me. There _are_ a few dirty ones in here.

I placed the ones with the slightly more revealing covers at the bottom of the pile and grab the topmost book. Finding where it belonged was easy enough since the covers are easy to distinguish. Yukinoshita and Yuigahama were doing their own piles while Zaimokuza would straighten the books on the shelves.

When I reached the ones with the dirtier covers, I grabbed all of them and held them with one arm and my body with the covers facing me. At least then, Yuigahama or Yukinoshita wouldn't be able to see them. As I was trying to discreetly place one of the books in the right place, Yukinoshita was able to see one of them and gave me a look of disgust. These aren't even _my_ books, you know.

All in all, it took us forty-five minutes to finish organizing the new books. It only took longer because Zaimokuza was taking his time straightening each book on the shelves. Well, thankfully his parents were already downstairs and had dinner prepared for all of us. His parents prepared _a lot_! It looks enough for eight people, even.

Surprisingly, or perhaps unsurprisingly, there was no food left after. Though I'm pretty sure it was the Zaimokuzas that ate most of it. After saying our thanks and taking our leave from his apartment, Zaimokuza escorted us to the entrance.

"Thank you very much, everyone!" he shouts and flashes all of us a smile. Great, no weird pose this time. At least he can say thanks properly.

"It's nothing. Really, I was surprised about your organization." Yuigahama tells him before she looks over to Yukinoshita.

"That's right. It would have taken more than a day if it weren't already as organized," Yukinoshita tells him before looking over to me. What, am I supposed to say something about how well-organized he is too?

"Well, thank you for dinner, Zaimokuza. See you on Monday."

"Yes, see you on Monday, Hachiman," he says before turning to head back to his apartment.

As he left, I turn to the girls and tell them, "well, I left my bike at school, so I'll see you on Monday."

"See you, Hikigaya-kun."  
"See you, Hikki!"

I walk back to school, and head to the bike racks. I unlocked my bike, and headed home.

"I'm home," I announce as I entered. Komachi is lying on the couch, using her phone, a big smile on her face. "Welcome home, onii-chan," she says as she finishes typing and sits up, "how did it go with Chuuni-kun?"

"It was okay," I say as I finish placing my shoes near the door. "I'm actually surprised he's as organized as he is. Heck, his room's even more organized than mine."

"Ah, is that so?" she asks, "Well, probably something you should learn from him."

"Yeah, yeah. Your onii-chan will learn to be more organized," I tell her as I pat her head. "I'm going up to my room. Good night, Komachi."

"Good night, onii-chan," she says before returning to the couch, and continues texting away.

I reach my room and place my bag on my chair, opening it, and taking out the light novel I've been reading. I lie down on my bed and read until I had to really go to sleep.

* * *

Saturday. It's almost noon, and I've only been lying on the couch and reading my light novel. Komachi is lying on the other side of the couch, reading whatever teen girl magazines they put out these days. Really, Komachi, I thought you were better than that. Your onii-chan still loves you, Komachi!

I'm glad I can relax today. The constant banter between me and Yukinoshita, Isshiki's neverending requests to help out with Student Council problems, and dealing with Yuigahama during breaks and after class all gets a bit tiring. But really, I can't say I don't enjoy them. It's quite nice I get to spend some time alone though. Plus, I have Komachi with me.

The relaxing silence is interrupted by the sound of the door bell ringing.

"Ah! My friends are here," Komachi quickly stands up and heads for the door

"Friends? It better not be that bug. Hmm, maybe I should get a broom just in case," I tell her as I sit up.

Komachi looks at me with a scowl on her face, and sighs. "Stupid gomii-chan. Relax, it's not Taishi-kun. The people I invited today are all girls," she quickly tells me before walking to the door.

All girls, huh? I guess I should head up and give them their privacy. I stand up and quickly start walking up the stairs. After a couple of steps up, the door opens and I hear something that made me stop.

"Yahallo, Komachi-chan!"  
" _Konnichiwa,_ Komachi-san."

Standing at the doorway, was Yukinoshita and Yuigahama.

Huh?!

* * *

 **Footnotes:**

 **[1] Yūutsu translates to melancholy.**


End file.
